Freely Captivated

Ten years ago, I met my husband. After we had been dating for a very short time, we decided to get married. So you know, we went through the premarital process of getting a marriage license, counseling, blah blah blah. That year I got my first lesson on love from my pastor. During one of our premarital counseling sessions, he spoke to us about love and to this day I remember what he said to us. The one thing that he said that stuck in my mind and heart was "Love is a choice. It's not something you fall into and out of". That statement has helped me through so many arguments and fights with my husband during the first few years of our marriage. I didn't quite understand its concept until I had opportunities to live it out. My pastor was right. Media and family, and friends....they twist the idea of love. We've been taught all of our lives that love is a feeling. It's not. We may feel attraction and passion to a particular person. But love does not fall into...

It's beginning to sink in just a bit. It's a lot easier to have hope when you have nothing but time standing in your way. But when you come to the realization that you may actually have a real obstacle to overcome, it's heart breaking. I'm talking about having children. It seems to be a lot easier to talk about when you have your own blog and you can write whatever you want. And just to warn you....I may be writing about it a lot. Having children is a desire of my heart. I cling to what the word says about that.... "Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart" (Psalm 37:4) I mean, of course I am going to have to work for it. That is the story of my life. I've had to work harder than anybody for everything I have. I just thought that maybe, this might be one of those easy times for me. It seems as though every other woman in America can conceive and give birth to beautiful babies. Not me...yet. I mean, really. They have...

Sometimes in the midst of difficulty, it is so hard to find God's goodness in it. I mean, seriously. It is. If there is one thing I have learned about God over the past ten years of this young life (hehe)...is that He is good. It doesn't matter if life is good, or terrible, or stinks like a rotten tomato. He never changes. EVER. I used to think a long time ago that He was just the same as every other person I had ever met. I can thankfully say that He proved me wrong. In fact, He has been the ONLY one I can really trust and count on. You have to know the story behind my life to see how true that statement is. I wish I had time to share the amount of goodness God has placed in my life. There is so much of it, it's oozing out and spilling over like a good ole rootbeer float. You know, where the foam just kind of spills over the top? That is God's goodness. Don't worry, I am exactly like you in the sense that, yes, I do have trials and trouble and struggles. But I don...

Okay, so at work we have a new night supervisor. She started 4 weeks ago. She's 22 years old. Need I say more? Hold that thought for a moment. I originally got hired on to work dayshift. I got to know everyone on that shift, including management, and they got to know me and how I work. I have been told numerous times that I am a hard worker. I have been told once by the manager herself. I must be doing something right. Right? I got asked to go to night shift . I happily agreed because my husband works nights, and a couple of other good reasons.  I created a good reputation. I am not going to lie. Sometimes, I admit, I can be hateful. People at work know it too, unfortunately. But overall, I created a good reputation. Until I transferred over to night shift. The new supervisor doesn't know me yet. Instead of asking me what I already know, she assumes I know how to do nothing because she is the supervisor and I am just the employee. She assumes I don't do a good job, and ...