My name is Amanda...and I am a Food Addict
I have a confession. Almost eleven years ago when I met my husband, I was a smoker. I would smoke a whole pack within a day. I used this addiction to help control my stress and boredom. My husband prayed that I would quit, and sure enough I did. And boy did I ever! He never asked me to quit and would never tell me that he didn't like it. But he prayed. God answers our husbands prayers, guys. I walked into the McDonalds he was working during this time, laid down my brand new pack of cigarettes and told him that I no longer wanted them. And just like that, a week later, around Valentines Day, I was completely smoke free! I went through a little depression and became weak, shaky, and dizzy. But what an awesome power of God that allows us to do something we never thought we could do!
But I stand before you today with a new problem. My name is Amanda, and I...am a food addict. Ten years ago, I put down a four year addiction...and picked up a brand new one. Instead of smoking, I have used food to help control my boredom and stress. Especially chocolate. But not only did I use food to help control these two problems, I used food for other things. It was used to cover feelings of sadness. It especially kicked in when I miscarried. I told God that year that I would quit smoking if I could just have a baby. I quit. I got pregnant. But that ended. I felt like God didn't keep His end of the bargain. I went into a depression, sleeping a lot and I felt sad all of the time. Jesus was my comforter, but food was my aid in covering those feelings of sadness. I gained weight pretty quickly at that time. It's not that I thought that food would aid in covering my sad feelings, but when we are sad we care a lot less about making good choices. That's if we let our emotions rule over us. I was good at that. Let my emotions rule over everything.
But today I am a completely different person. I have healed physically and emotionally from the miscarriage. I have joy, and wholeness, and a confidence that I didn't before, and a lot better hold of my emotions...most of the time. But my addiction to food still remains. God has given me this revelation this morning as I began to feel sad. Been sleeping a lot lately. It's a depression thing. Almost two weeks ago, I made a life changing decision to get healthy and eat better. I know it will help me lose weight. And I know losing weight and getting healthier is what God wants for me so He can give me children. I've known this the past few years, and yet just now is when I decided to make the change. But it's been hard for me. I've been wanting to eat healthy, but it usually only lasted for about a week. This time I am much more dedicated. I have one goal in mind. Family. But just like any other addiction comes it's side effects. I've been feeling shaky, sad, moody, and tired a lot more lately. I know it's just my body fighting me. I also know that I will overcome this just as I overcame my addiction to smoking. Jesus was there for me then, and He is here for me now. He said He would never leave me or forsake me in my weaknesses. This is my weakness. I love food. But with better choices, I am changing my life for the better, daily. I know that from here, it gets better. But it's so hard for me right now. Food is everywhere! Just pray for me. I know Jesus would not allow me to go through such a process unless it is what He wanted for me. I know these life changing decisions are working because otherwise, I wouldn't have such obstacles and dificulties. The only direction from the pit is OUT!
My prayer today is that God will take this transformation, once complete, and use me to help others struggling with the same problem. This is my prayer for everything God has changed in my life. I want to be more involved with people who are lost. Praying that God uses this transformation to help others not only with the same current problem, but also with problems from the past the He has helped me overcome. This right here is going to be my window of opportunity. You just wait and see how god will use me in this. This is going to be my open door for me to minister to others. I am so excited. This is the breakthrough I've been waiting for. Thank you Jesus...for everything.
But I stand before you today with a new problem. My name is Amanda, and I...am a food addict. Ten years ago, I put down a four year addiction...and picked up a brand new one. Instead of smoking, I have used food to help control my boredom and stress. Especially chocolate. But not only did I use food to help control these two problems, I used food for other things. It was used to cover feelings of sadness. It especially kicked in when I miscarried. I told God that year that I would quit smoking if I could just have a baby. I quit. I got pregnant. But that ended. I felt like God didn't keep His end of the bargain. I went into a depression, sleeping a lot and I felt sad all of the time. Jesus was my comforter, but food was my aid in covering those feelings of sadness. I gained weight pretty quickly at that time. It's not that I thought that food would aid in covering my sad feelings, but when we are sad we care a lot less about making good choices. That's if we let our emotions rule over us. I was good at that. Let my emotions rule over everything.
But today I am a completely different person. I have healed physically and emotionally from the miscarriage. I have joy, and wholeness, and a confidence that I didn't before, and a lot better hold of my emotions...most of the time. But my addiction to food still remains. God has given me this revelation this morning as I began to feel sad. Been sleeping a lot lately. It's a depression thing. Almost two weeks ago, I made a life changing decision to get healthy and eat better. I know it will help me lose weight. And I know losing weight and getting healthier is what God wants for me so He can give me children. I've known this the past few years, and yet just now is when I decided to make the change. But it's been hard for me. I've been wanting to eat healthy, but it usually only lasted for about a week. This time I am much more dedicated. I have one goal in mind. Family. But just like any other addiction comes it's side effects. I've been feeling shaky, sad, moody, and tired a lot more lately. I know it's just my body fighting me. I also know that I will overcome this just as I overcame my addiction to smoking. Jesus was there for me then, and He is here for me now. He said He would never leave me or forsake me in my weaknesses. This is my weakness. I love food. But with better choices, I am changing my life for the better, daily. I know that from here, it gets better. But it's so hard for me right now. Food is everywhere! Just pray for me. I know Jesus would not allow me to go through such a process unless it is what He wanted for me. I know these life changing decisions are working because otherwise, I wouldn't have such obstacles and dificulties. The only direction from the pit is OUT!
My prayer today is that God will take this transformation, once complete, and use me to help others struggling with the same problem. This is my prayer for everything God has changed in my life. I want to be more involved with people who are lost. Praying that God uses this transformation to help others not only with the same current problem, but also with problems from the past the He has helped me overcome. This right here is going to be my window of opportunity. You just wait and see how god will use me in this. This is going to be my open door for me to minister to others. I am so excited. This is the breakthrough I've been waiting for. Thank you Jesus...for everything.
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